A very unusual Blog – reader beware!

This blog has been percolating in my head like a finely brewing cup of coffee that is in imminent danger of burning. With as little melodrama as I can avoid, let me lay IT out because there’s nothing more to lose. Essentially, I have lost everything I own by volunteering the last twelve years of my life to the cause of warning teens about the unseen danger of HIV/AIDS. I have never been able to take a salary – nothing – since TeenAIDS became a 501 c 3 in 1997 because donations always went to fund our ambitious programs, not overhead expenses. And now the result is clear.

The bank is ready to foreclose on my home that houses TeenAIDS; I am selling off my possessions to pay the utilities and necessities; and my car was towed away today because it was totaled in a bad December ice storm that ravaged central Massachusetts while I was in the Congo. An intern had left it parked outside the garage when a tree demolished it. I had some insurance but you know how that business runs. After the deduction, I was left with a check that is enough to pay off a few months of past mortgage payments. I now live below the poverty line.

With the economy in a nose-dive, charitable contributions have all but dried up. I don’t want sympathy because there are many people I know suffering much more. My emails are filled with pleas from youth around the world asking for financial help after they took up my call to get involved in peer-led volunteerism to fight HIV. No longer can I send them modest donations of support. The PeerCorps model is still the most effective method to persuade adolescents to take responsibility for their high-risk behaviors. But I am a realist. My global outreach is now over. I am proud that 330,000 young people have been personally trained in the 83 countries that I have walked in. Yet, the well has just about dried up in these financially troubled times.

A few months ago, a major donor asked me to admit my mistake – namely, that it was my fault that I didn’t insist on taking even partial pay. Heck, I am willing to list many failings but at that time, I was still the optimist. As one dear friend constantly reminds me, “John, every time things look bleak, something always happens that keeps TeenAIDS going.” And she was right. Operating TeenAIDS on a small budget provided by loyal donors has been like a rickety roller coaster ride, exhilarating on the climb and scary on the turns.

Truth be told, I am a purist. I didn’t want to compromise our medically accurate teachings to gain the favor of government or religious support. If we had been willing to preach “Abstinence-only-before-marriage” dogma and not tell the whole truth to teens, we could have received grants and I could have been paid a modest amount to survive on.

I am writing the book that I should have written years ago but perhaps the time is right now. It will tell the whole story about making a commitment to take the AIDS prevention campaign to the streets of the world – the many ups and downs and successes along the way – with no holds barred.

Let me make this clear - we are each responsible for making our own beds and nothing comes from whining. At this point, the PeerCorps legacy will survive. How, I am not quite sure. All options are on the table. Certainly, a manuscript that details the rising youth HIV epidemic and tells the stories of young heroes in communities worldwide will serve as a beacon for proactive volunteer efforts.

I believe in this humanitarian cause with passion and the dedication of my life.